Staying positive can be hard.
Sometimes, when I try and smile, I can feel the hot hands of Satan pulling down on either side of my mouth reminding me I am, unbeknownst to me, in Hell.
(Don’t become a writer, kids. Life gets inexplicably dark.)
I thought I’d do some research on how to be happy in spite of the reign of terror that is life!
1) Go outside more.
2) Delete Twitter.
3) Volunteer at a donkey or goat sanctuary (it’s impossible to be sad around either).
4) Move to the woods. Far away from people. Amazon delivers everywhere — you’ll be fine.
5) Be naked 96% of the time.